Monday, 28 September 2015

Reputation and Character, two Parts of the Whole

Developing your reputation… Turning negatives into positives in difficult times…

 George Washington once said “Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company”. Coming from a man who was a ruthlessly great leader in times of turmoil and change in the United States, the focus on character and what one should value in difficult circumstances is still key to a good outcome. Everybody respected his reputation, which he built on the timeless tenets of good character.

So if reputation is what others think of you, then character is what you actually are! The following are my own lessons learned in life in managing to stay true to myself through some difficult times dealing with difficult people.

Mental Strength: If something is contrary to your core values, then don’t do it. You may take an initial short term loss, but your courage and mental strength in saying No will be rewarded with interest in times to come. Think of it this way, life without money and influence can be truly happy whereas life without any self respect cannot!

Integrity: Never leave a conversation where the counter-party thinks your integrity is for sale. It does not have to be money, but those with ulterior motives will try to find a way to comprise your integrity to further their own agenda. Respect has true roots in integrity. If you are to gain a good reputation that is sustainable, you need to ring fence your integrity as a prize possession of your character. If someone stamps on it, push back and state how you need to see the world and why. If they don’t like it, then can move on one way or another!

Situational Awareness: With a balanced mind and a calm demeanour, open your mind to everything in your environment. Read it for clues as to what is coming next and if you sense/figure out something bad is coming, don’t stress and panic. Remember, you have the edge as you defeated your counter-party’s element of surprise. Unfairly springing something on you is common when people have traded their integrity for bad practice and a couple of bucks! Try not make their problem yours!

Perspective: Through all bad encounters, it’s hard to keep perspective. Why you are there, what will your reputation be like when the ‘Sharks’ are done with you what impact will it all have on your character??? If George Washington can stay true to himself maintaining his character in most difficult of circumstances, then it befalls on us all to follow suite. We never think about these things through good times and are often ill prepared for the dark times! That said, if you know what to look for, you can keep your perspective and stay ahead of a dark strategy that when known is rather predictable and less impressive than when first encountered.

The above are key to building and maintaining good character. So with this awareness, we are well advised to manage our reputation by:


 Character - per above, never compromise your character. When everything else is gone, it’s all you have. Protect it and it will shine bright in the darkest of nights guiding you to a new dawn!

Discretion - its ok to say ‘no’ to things you find bad, incorrect or just plain wrong! Always be assertively diplomatic and explain why you disagree. If your counter-party elaborates on what is asked of you and your picture changes to where you no longer find it incorrect, bad or wrong, then be flexible. Remember that your interests are not compromised, so why not get back on board?

Fellowship - wisdom is in the eye of the beholder, so a calm and informed view on an issue is a great place to start. Not been afraid to collaborate and ‘admit’ you don’t know something is an opportunity to show your colleagues that you trust them and want their help. The bonds of fellowship run deep in good people that have travelled difficult paths together!

Experience - As my dear brother would say “pick your battles that make a real difference”. If your character shines through in what you stand for and what you allow to pass, then your reputation will follow a similar growth trajectory. Leave bitterness, hate, anger and jealousy in the past for they only serve to educate one to a better state of being. Refine your character with your experience learning continuously how to be a better human being! Such commitment shows in your character and will reflect positively in your reputation.

Wisdom - A great Islamic scholar called Rumi once said “If there is light in your heart, you will always find your way home”. Through times good and bad, we should always remember our experience, knowledge and understanding dwell in our minds, but inhabit our hearts! Keeping our hearts clean will reflect in how we live along with the strength of our character fuelling insights and wisdom on any given day. Our reputation can be built upon those cornerstones!


Our reputation is a mirror that society reflects upon us. It’s the communal view of who we are and adjusts as we do through life. You will notice that those who are honest and strong of character will not see their reputation change much. It’s not easy at times but eventually society will recognise good as good and bad as bad. When our children’s children look back on us many years from now, don’t we want them to remember who we truly were? In staying true to ourselves, we increase the chance of them seeing this and embracing what becomes our legacy, which is a clear and honest picture of our time on this earth. 

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